The SmarK Rant for AEW Dynamite – 08.02.23

The SmarK Rant for AEW Dynamite – 08.02.23

“AEW Dynamite 200”

Went to go see Ninja Turtles tonight before the show. It was tremendous. The bar has been set high for entertainment tonight.

Live from Tampa, FL

Your hosts are Excalibur, Tony Schiavone & Taz

Chris Jericho & Konosuke Takeshita v. Sammy Guevara & Daniel Garcia

The tunnels and original color scheme are back for tonight, along with the brightly lit crowd. Sammy and Jericho trade chops to start and Sammy puts him down with a dropkick and jumping knee. This naturally leads to a quick posing break before Garcia comes in and dances in Jericho’s face. So Takeshita comes in with the Warrior clothesline and some dancing for two. Jericho with a back suplex and arrogant cover for two. Garcia slugs back, but Don Callis trips him up and we take a break. Back with a Lionsault from Jericho, but Garcia gets the knees up to block. And it’s hot tag Sammy, even though he was standing on the bottom rope and so it shouldn’t count. Without rules we have ANARCHY. But Sammy runs wild and dives onto Jericho, and a frog splash on Takeshita gets two. Takeshita with a Blue Thunder Bomb on Sammy and a Liontamer, but Jericho tags himself in and Sammy catches him with a Spanish Fly for two. Sammy with a cradle for two and they’re both down, but Garcia comes in and Jericho hits him with a codebreaker for two. Garcia with a flying kick for two, but Takeshita makes the save. Sammy puts Takeshita on the floor and follows with a shooting star to the floor, and Garcia blocks the Judas Effect and rolls Jericho up for two. Garcia with the Dragon Tamer, but Callis uses the bat to break it up and now Jericho is torn, although he decides to pin him anyway at 12:00 because he’s still bad. Fun opener. ***1/4

Meanwhile, Tony Khan takes us back to the creation of AEW and we get highlights of 200 episodes. Who’s the blond guy they keep showing?

Meanwhile, even Daddy Magic has had enough of Jericho.

Jack Perry joins us for his face to face with Jerry Lynn, but Jerry declines to face Jack because of his years of injuries. But he’s got a friend who also wrestled in ECW, which gives us the AEW debut of Rob Van Dam. Complete with Pantera! And a monster reaction. Perry decides to walk away and then attacks with a chair, but that backfires, so he runs away and hides behind a little girl at ringside in a tremendous heel spot. Rob was certainly looking his age here, though, so hopefully he can still go.

Oddly enough Impact posted this to their YouTube page tonight.

Jon Moxley v. Trent Berreta v. Penta

We immediately get dives on the floor and Moxley lays out both guys with trash cans and hits Penta with a cutter in the ring. Naturally he grabs a barbed wire 2×4 next, but Penta gets that and hits a backstabber, only for Moxley to get the board and brutalize Trent with it. Moxley with a piledriver but he lands on his own barbed wire, and then Trent suplexes him onto the barbed wire to follow. So Trent is busted open and Penta puts him on tables outside, but Moxley uses barbed wire on Penta to cut that off. I’m shocked that Moxley isn’t bleeding yet. Trent superplexes Moxley through the tables and we take a break. That’s quite the commercial break spot. Back with Penta putting Trent on another table in the ring, and they fight to the top rope before Penta hits a Destroyer off the top and through the table. And then Moxley spears Penta through another table and everyone is out. So Moxley finds thumbtacks and makes sure that Penta is shirtless before piledriving him on the tacks for two. Suplex on the tacks for Penta, and then he hits a cutter on Trent onto the tacks, but Trent gets Strong Zero onto the tacks for two as Penta saves. They all slug it out and Trent manages to win that one, but Penta superkicks him into a Moxley lariat to get rid of him. And then those two slug it out, but Moxley gets the DDT and Trent steals the pin at 12:34. This was insane. ****. Moxley decides to be a sore loser and chokes Trent out afterwards, which brings out the BCC to help, but they get into a brawl with Chuck and Orange, which ends with the Best Friends clearing the ring. So then Chuck challenges them the parking lot fight at Daily’s Place on Rampage to settle things. Yeah that’ll work.

Meanwhile, RVD chats with Renee, and challenges Jack Perry to an FTW title match next week so he can retire that one too.

MJF joins us to a very large babyface reaction, and tells us about his struggles with ADD and getting bullied in school. But now he’s beginning to think that hating the world is no way to live because you become the thing you hate. Getting booed is easy but being vulnerable is hard. And now he’s ready to be OUR scumbag. So he brings out Adam Cole, who is proud of Max’s progress. But Max made a promise to Adam to give him a title shot, but now he’s decided that Adam doesn’t just deserve any title match, he deserves the main event of All In at Wembley. So he gives Adam the contract (Crowd: “Read it!”) and everyone is still waiting for the turn, but nothing yet. However, we cut to the back, where Roddy Strong is freaking out and smashing up the backstage area in frustration.

The Elite v. Jeff Jarrett, Satnam Singh & Jay Lethal

Is it any coincidence that the Elite signed new contracts on the same day they were booked to work with Jeff Jarrett? I THINK NOT. Kenny Omega v. Jeff Jarrett for All In is practically confirmed, so close I can taste it. However, I’m concerned that the British won’t understand the guitar gimmick. Do they play guitar in Britain? Jeff gets some slams on Kenny and stops to strut about it, and then pokes the eyes and brings Lethal in. The Elite triple-teams Jay in the corner and works the arm, so Jay lets Satnam come in and Matt welcomes the challenge. So Kenny and Nick walk away and let him deal with that himself, but Nick gets tagged in anyway and the Bucks try some double-teams, which go badly for them. And the heels are so happy they have to pose as we take a break. Back with Nick superkicking JJ and making the hot tag to Omega. You Can’t Escape on Lethal, but Satnam breaks that up and Jay gets the knees up. Apparently you CAN escape. Bucks with a SUPERKICK PARTY and Kenny manages to put Satnam down with the V-Trigger. So Karen takes the ref and Sonjay distracts Omega, before Cutler gets involved and then the Hardy Boyz lay out Dutt. Jarrett tries for the El Kabong, but Hangman hits the ring and gets rid of him, before Kenny finishes Lethal with the One Winged Angel at 9:00. This was, fittingly, an AEW Party Match here on the 200^th episode. This was goofy as fuck but as long as we get Omega v. Jarrett in the long-rumored main event of All In, it’s all good. Granted I may have started that rumor myself. **1/2.

Meanwhile, Swerve and AR Fox stop by the Buddy Wayne training academy and start some shit with Nick Wayne, smashing the photo of his father over his head to bust him open and then stealing Nick’s phone and calling Darby Allin like a supervillain. Damn, now that was a heavy heat angle.

ROH World tag team titles: Aussie Open v. Vikingo & Komander

My wife continues to enjoy watching Komander after seeing him against Jericho in Saskatoon (“He’s the guy who like to go deedle-deedle-deedle on the ropes!”) and the luchadors clear the ring righta way. Aussie Open double-teams Komander and Davis gets a senton. Double-team cutter gets two on Komander. Komander goes up the ropes and Fletcher knocks him down, but Komander does a tremendous sell where he hangs onto the middle rope and sends Fletcher to the floor as a result. Over to Vikingo, who hits Fletcher with a diving legdrop, and they clear the ring and follow with stereo dives. But Aussie Open catches them and rams them together as we take a break. Back with a double team powerbomb on Vikingo for two. But then Davis tries a fireman’s carry on Vikingo and Komander dives off their shoulders with a destroyer on Fletcher. And we get double rope walks into dives on the floor, and back in for a double 450 on Davis that gets two. Komander with the ropewalk shooting star, but Davis moves and Aussie Open destroys him with a double lariat and finishes with the Coriolis at 9:52 to retain. I wish they’d stop jobbing Komander in every match but this was tremendous fun. ***1/2

Meanwhile, we take a look at Collision for this Saturday. Good luck against Summerslam.

AEW World Women’s title: Toni Storm v. Hikaru Shida

The graphic lists Storm as being champion for “332 days”. What the hell kind of math are they using to get THAT? Even adding up both her reigns it’s still only like 4 months total. They slug it out to start and Shida chases Storm to the floor for some moral support from the Outcasts. Back in the ring, Storm cuts off Shida with a hairpull, but Shida takes her down and slugs away before going to her own hairpulling and pounding away on the mat. To the floor the kneelift on the apron and Shida beats on her out there, but Storm drops her on the railing to take over. Back in the ring, Shida suplexes her into the turnbuckles, so Toni rakes the eyes and puts her on the floor for some abuse from the Outcasts. Back in the ring, that gets two as we take a break. Back with Shida coming back with a german suplex and enzuigiri. Shida with a missile dropkick for two. Meteora gets two. Storm uses the Outcast distraction and gets a DDT to cut off the comeback, and follows with the hip attack and DDT for two. They slug it out and Shida comes back with the falcon arrow for two, but Saraya sends the kendo stick in and Shida almost uses it and gets DQd, but then hits the Outcasts instead. This allows Storm to use the spraypaint and Storm Zero, but that only gets two. Another try, but Shida reverses to a cradle and wins the title for the second time at 13:28 in a pretty shocking result. I thought they were gonna do some kind of screwjob finish to set up a Wembley rematch but NOPE. Good for Shida, hope she gets another good run with it this time. Hell of a match, too, and I assume this result and position on the show was a reaction to the shaming from the sign last week. ***3/4.

Now this was more like it! We got the old school Dynamite set, banger after banger, a big surprise guest, a title change in the main event and Jon Moxley didn’t even bleed! Plus the main event of All In announced as well as PPV status clarified once and for all. This was GREAT.

Collision is probably gonna have to wait until Sunday, though.