The SmarK Rant for AEW Forbidden Door II – 06.25.23

The SmarK Rant for AEW x NJPW Forbidden Door II – 06.25.23

FITE’s sound mix for this show is really tinny and hollow tonight on the crowd mic, so if there’s stuff where the crowd reactions come off weird for me, that’s probably why.

Live from Toronto, ON

Your hosts are Excalibur, Kevin Kelly & Taz

AEW World title: MJF v. Hiroshi Tanahashi

MJF goes with the air guitar disrespect to start, so Tana sends him to the floor and gives us EXTRA air guitar. MJF tries to walk away like a Russian mercenary, but then changes his mind and offers a sportsmanlike handshake instead. And he turns on Tanahashi, but then hides behind the ref and gets a cheapshot in the corner to take over. Tanahashi rolls him up for two, but MJF gets the abdominal stretch and uses the ropes. Tanahashi escapes and makes a comeback with a somersault senton for two. They fight to the top and Tanahashi comes down with a bodypress and MJF does a Flair Flip and gets slammed off the top for two. Tanahashi goes up and Max crotches him to bring him down and follows with a superplex for two. Shoulderbreaker gets two and MJF spits on him and puts the badmouth on him, but apparently calling him a joke just gets him all riled up. MJF slugs away and pokes him in the eye, but he walks into a dragon screw and Tanahashi puts him in the Cloverleaf to work on the leg. Max makes the ropes and tries for a brainbuster, but Tanahashi reverses to the neckbreaker and slingblade. High Fly Flow hits the knees, but that also hurts MJF’s leg after it was worked over. Max goes for the title belt and gets caught, so Tanahashi rolls him up for two. And with the ref distracted by Tanahashi’s argument, Maxwell pulls out the ring and KOs him for the pin at 15:34 to retain. This was a good, deliberately-paced opener and about the best you were getting out of the broken down Tanahashi at this point, I think. ***1/4.

Owen Hart tournament quarterfinals: Satoshi Kojima v. CM Punk

Another decidedly un-Chicago reaction for Punk tonight. Punk works a headlock while the crowd tries to decide if they love or hate him, and Kojima pounds him with forearms in the corner and stops to pop his pecs for the crowd. Punk tosses him and they fight on the floor, where Punk beats on him with chops, but Kojima sends Punk over the railing with his own chop and they head back in the ring. Kojima SWEEPS THE LEG and stomps him down, but Punk takes out the knee and then slams him to set up a legdrop, brother. They slug it out and Punk beats on him in the corner and gets a snapmare for two. Punk with the corner lariats while yelling out “Lariat!” over and over to be a dick, and a back suplex gets two. Punk with the MONGOLIAN CHOP in the corner as he channels Tenzan next, but he misses a blind charge and Kojima fights back with the chops and goes up for the elbow drop for two. Right in the yam bag! Hit him in the gimmick, notes Taz. Kojima with a DDT, but Punk esacpes the Koji Kutter and goes up for his own elbow drop, which gets two. Into the Anaconda Vice, but Kojima fights out of it. “Pepsi Sucks!” notes the crowd. Let’s not say anything we can’t take back, Toronto. Punk tries to finish, but Kojima fights back with the Koji Kutter, but misses the lariat. Punk with a neckbreaker for two off that. Punk riles up the crowd again and tries the GTS, but Kojima catches the knee and puts him down with a brainbuster for two. Another lariat misses and Punk hits the high kick and finishes with the GTS at 13:36 to advance to the semifinals. This was another fun and wacky match with Punk working hard and trolling the crowd at the same time in some impressive multi-tasking. ***1/4.

AEW International title: Orange Cassidy v. Zack Sabre Jr v. Daniel Garcia v. Katsuyori Shibata

Orange throws the vicious kicks on everyone right away to clear the ring, but Garcia takes him down with the Dragontamer. And then Shibata breaks that up and puts Orange in the figure-four and Zack uses some SMALL JOINT MANIPULATION while Taz complains about gimmick infringement. Orange takes a break while the three challengers all slug it out until Orange comes in and cleans house again. And all four throw big boots for a four-way down. So we get double submissions while Zack and Shibata continue throwing chops while getting choked. Everyone trades suplexes and Orange hits Garcia with the DDT for two. Zack takes him to the apron and does mean things to Orange’s hand, so Garcia hits Shibata with the Pure title for two. Garcia slugs away with forearms in the corner, but Shibata fires back and puts him down with the corner dropkick. This gives us the Orange-Shibata showdown as they trade chops until Orange goes to the pockets and then fires off the Orange Punch. And Shibata doesn’t even go down, putting Orange down with an elbow. But Orange hits the Beach Break for two. Zack goes back to mangling Cassidy’s hand, and he counters the Mouse Trap into an even wackier submission hold until Garcia breaks it up. So Zack takes out HIS arm and then goes right back to torturing Orange again until Shibata chokes him out to break that up. Zack rolls up Shibata for two and gets a Gedo clutch for two in a sweet sequence, but Garcia saves. Garcia with a backslide for two on Zack and a piledriver follows, but Shibata hits Garcia with the PK and then Orange “bum rushes” him and steals the pin at 11:35 to retain. No real surprise there but goddamn this was fun. ****1/4. I’m gonna need that singles match with ZSJ now, though. Obviously Garcia was there to eat the pin but this was the Zack Sabre Jr show all the way.

IWGP World title: Sanada v. Jungle Jack Perry

Red Shoes gets a giant reaction from the crowd so you know it’s a hot one. They trade takedowns to start and Jack immediately gets the Snare Trap, but Sanada makes the ropes. Dropkick puts Jungle Boy on the floor and Sanada tries a dive, but Perry evades him and dropkicks him off the apron for his own dive. Back in, that gets two. They slug it out and Sanada tries the Paradise Lock, but Perry escapes that and tries his own, which undermines his claim of not watching Sanada’s matches. So Sanada gets the hold on the second try and kicks Perry in the ass to break it, and that gets two. They trade chops and Sanada puts him down with a big boot and Jack fights back with a lariat and superkick for two. Sanada with a neckbreaker for two and they trade some stanky chops. Perry backslides him for two and hooks him in the Skull End, but Sanada makes the ropes. Guys, I think Perry might have been lying on Twitter. Sanada comes back with the TKO for two and tries his own Skull End, but Perry escapes with the poison rana. Sanada gets another Skull End after a spin, but Perry counters that with a rollup for two. Sanada with his own poison rana and a shining wizard for two. Moonsault gets the pin at 10:41 to retain. Kind of a flat finish. This was about what I was expecting out of it, just kind of a paint by numbers title match. **1/2. And then Jungle Boy finally does the heel turn on Hook on the way back to the dressing room and the crowd is READY to boo him. “You fucked up!” notes the crowd. “He sure did” Taz agrees. Oh we were all waiting for that one and I’m pretty sure Perry is gonna be awesome in that role.

Eddie Kingston, Tomohiro Ishii, The Young Bucks & Hangman Page v. Jon Moxley, Claudio Castagnoli, Wheeler Yuta, Shota Umino & Konosuke Takeshita

I like that Kevin Kelly is playing casual observer here and gets Excalibur to recap the Claudio-Eddie beef for newer viewers. Hangman starts with Umino after we get a quick tease of Kingston and Claudio, and Umino gets some legsweeps before Page puts the boots to him. Ishii comes in to help and puts the Shooter down, so it’s over to Takeshita, who trades forearms with Ishii and is still drawing nuclear heat. They trade shoulders and Ishii is the one who goes down first, but he doesn’t stay down and they collide for a double down. The Bucks do some double-teaming on the heels and then we get the showdown between Eddie and Jon and Moxley takes the first shot. So Eddie is like “OK then” and they trade chops while everyone else just stops to watch. Finally they can’t take any more and everyone runs in and brawls and does crazy highspots outside while Eddie and Jon beat each other into hamburger.

But then Claudio hits Eddie from behind with a cheap forearm and comes in to put the boots to Eddie while Moxley has to pour water on his chest to cool it off. Eddie fights back with chops on Claudio, but Claudio just catches the hand and puts him down with a lariat. Takeshita chinlocks Eddie and Ishii goes to break that up, so Takeshita DESTROYS Ishii with a forearm and knocks him right on his ass. Umino comes in with a neckbreaker on Kingston for two. Claudio beats on him in the corner again, but Eddie fights back with a lariat and Moxley has to cut off the tag and goads him into another chop battle. Eddie survives that and makes the tag to Ishii, who slugs it out with Claudio and puts him down with a brainbuster. Umino and Takeshita double-team Ishii in the corner and hit him with a double team powerbomb for two. Ishii fights back with a backdrop suplex and it’s back to Hangman, who slugs it out with Takeshita and blocks the Warrior clothesline with his own lariat in a brutal spot. Takeshita bumps to the apron, so the Bucks catch him and hold him for Page to splash from the apron. Back in the ring, Page with a flying clothesline for two. The Elite triple-teams Takeshita in the corner and the Bucks double-team him to set up the BTE Trigger, but Takeshita ducks that and suplexes them both on their asses.

Bucks with the SUPERKICK PARTY on the BCC members to recover, but Eddie saves Moxley for some reason and that allows Takeshita to powerbomb Matt for two. Takeshita with a Big Bang Theory into a wheelbarrow suplex, and Yuta follows with a german suplex on Matt for two. BCC clears the ring again and we get a Hart Attack from Moxley and Umino, into the Giant Swing from Claudio, and Yuta dropkicks him out of that for two. Rocket Launcher is broken up by Nick Jackson, so Ishii comes in to take care of Yuta with a superplex for two. Eddie and Ishii team up to further destroy Yuta, but Claudio breaks up Ishii’s lariat and Yuta gets two. Everyone throws bombs, however and Ishii finishes Yuta with the brainbuster at 21:30. This was incredible and non-stop action, our first show-stealer of the night. Likely not the last. It was a bit too long past the peak for the full monty but still absolutely worth going out of your way to see. ****1/2.

AEW World Women’s title: Toni Storm v. Willow Nightingale

They’re gonna have trouble following that last one. Willow takes her down with a facelock for one and Toni bails to the floor to confer with the Outcasts. Back in, Willow with a cradle for two and she follows with a corner splash and dropkicks her to the floor. The Outcasts are all bitchy about it, so Willow beats them up and then walks right into the hip attack. Back in the ring, Saraya gets some choking and Toni suplexes Willow for two. Toni with the full nelson, but Willow escapes with a samoan drop and boots Toni to the apron. Death valley driver out there, right onto the Forbidden Door, and back in for another one that gets two. The ladies try to throw the paint into the ring and the ref catches them and expels them, and Willow rolls up Toni for two. Willow with the moonsault, but that misses, and Toni hits the hip attack and DDT for two. Willow makes the comeback with a spinebuster and wraps her up with a deathlock on the mat while chopping her right on the boobs, so Toni bites the knee to escape. Willow pounces her and Toni bumps to the floor to escape, but Willow hauls her in for a corner splash and clotheslines to set up the comeback. But Toni hides behind the ref and then hits the piledriver for the pin to retain at 10:25. Storm gave her a ton of offense here but the crowd was pretty burned out from the last match, as expected. This was still quite good, though. ***

IWGP US title: Kenny Omega v. Will Ospreay

BREAKING NEWS: CM Punk spotted backstage saying that he prefers Mortal Kombat. Oh man, what if they tie all this together by putting Don Callis with CM Punk? The arena might burn down. They trade wristlocks to start and Ospreay has some fans in the crowd tonight. They trade chops in the corner and Omega escapes the OsCutter and they trade reversals and fight to a stalemate. Ospreay with the thumb to the eye and he puts Omega down with a nasty chop, but Omega snaps off a rana and You Can’t Escape gets two. Will bails to the floor, but Callis trips up Kenny on the Terminator Dive and that earns him an ejection while his security team protects him. This allows Ospreay to send Kenny into the post to take over. Back in the ring, Will goes to work on the back and gets a suplex for two. He works the back with the cobra twist, but Kenny comes back with the facebuster and punts him down for two. Ospreay flips back into an enzuigiri and suplexes Kenny onto the top rope for a shooting star press guillotine. OsCutter on the apron follows as Ospreay suddenly finds another gear. They fight on the floor and Ospreay just tries to slam Kenny’s face through the top of the announce table in a vicious spot. Kenny is understandably busted open by this and the crowd reminds Will that he’s still a wanker.

Back in the ring, Will stops to lick some of Omega’s blood off his bicep, but Kenny fights back again, so Ospreay slugs him down. This sets up a V-Trigger from Ospreay to put Kenny onto the apron, and Will stops to steal a Canadian flag and gives it the Shawn Michaels treatment. So Kenny gets fired up and chokes him out with the flag before throwing him around the ring, then hangs him with it before giving it to some kids at ringside and then hitting Ospreay with a V-Trigger into the railing. So Omega smashes Will’s head into the stairs to get some revenge, and Will is wearing the crimson mask. Next up, Kenny puts the stairs sideways and DDTs Ospreay onto them for your next sick spot of the match. Back in the ring, Kenny beats on the cut and tries to choke him out before switching to an armbar, but Ospreay powerbombs out of that. German suplex follows, but Omega lands on his feet and hits his own. Ospreay catches him with the Spanish Fly for two. This sets up the Sharpshooter from Ospreay to really piss off the crowd, but Kenny powers out of that. So Ospreay leaps into a crossface, possibly referencing another Canadian, but Kenny makes the ropes. Ospreay with the Kawada kicks and chops to really egg Omega on and then he puts Kenny down with a headbutt and adds some kicks to set up the OsCutter…which Kenny blocks with a knee strike. Snapdragon and poison rana set up a piledriver for two.

Kenny with the neckbreaker to set up a V-Trigger in the corner and he teases the One Winged Angel on the top, but Ospreay flips out of it and puts Kenny down with a superkick. Kenny hits the floor and Ospreay follows with a Sky Twister Press and then right back in for a flying forearm to the back. Kenny dodges the Hidden Blade, but Ospreay powerbombs him for two. OsCutter gets two. Omega reverses the Stormbreaker into a Deadeye, but Don Callis returns to provide moral support for Will. So Kenny dedicates a running knee to Don, but Callis uses his own body to shield Ospreay. So Kenny hits it anyway, but Callis gives Ospreay the PHILIPS HEAD SCREWDRIVER OF DEATH and Will nails Kenny to escape the One Winged Angel. Hidden Blade and Stormbreaker get two, as Kenny’s foot lands in the ropes. Everyone thought that was the finish! So Will hits his own V-Trigger on Kenny and follows with the One Winged Angel, but Kenny KICKS OUT AT ONE, MUTHAFUCKA and makes the comeback in an awesome moment. They slug it out and Kenny hits him with a knee and a brainbuster, but can’t get the Angel, so he hits a german suplex for two instead. V-Trigger sets up another Angel, but Ospreay reverses out to a ripcord elbow and A GODDAMMNED TIGER DRIVER 91, dropping Kenny right on his damn head, for two, as the crowd has a heart attack. Me too. Hidden Blade and Stormbreaker again, and that gives Ospreay the US title at 39:37 in a heartbreaking finish. This was an incredible spectacle, with the two false finishes at the end making it one of the greatest matches in North American history. *******

Definitely time for a PARTY MATCH now.

Sting, Darby Allin & Tetsuya Naito v. Chris Jericho, Minoru Suzuki & Sammy Guevara

Sammy flips away from Naito and puts him down with a dropkick, but Naito tosses him and gives us some posing of his own. Back in the ring, Naito dropkicks the neck and brings Darby in, so he gets Suzuki. Kevin Kelly warning Tony “not to look him in the eye” is hilarious and very true. So they trade shots while the crowd chants for Murder Grandpa, but Darby survives it and reverses the choke into a cradle for two. So Sting comes in and we finally get the Sting-Jericho match, with Sting quickly putting him in the Scorpion Deathlock. Sammy dives in with a cutter to save his boss, and Le Sex Gods double-team Sting and stop for their pose. Now with added Suzuki! Sammy slugs away in the corner and Sting drops him on the top turnbuckle and Darby comes in for the Code Red for two. But he goes up and Sammy brings him down with the Spanish Fly for two.

They collide in the corner and it’s over to Naito, who takes Jericho down with a rana and follows with a neckbreaker. Jericho catches him with a sleeper and we get triple sleepers from the heels, but Darby bumps Suzuki and hits him with a tope. But he tries one on Jericho and walks into a Judas Effect. Jericho finds a table for Sting and orders Sammy to 630 him, and Sammy obliges. Naito rolls up Jericho for two in the meantime and blocks the Lionsault, but Jericho blocks Destino. But Sting shrugs off his own death and puts Jericho in the Deathlock, and Suzuki breaks that up with the choke. Jericho with the codebreaker on Naito, which gets two. Suzuki beats him down and tries the choke, but Naito fights out of that with help from Sting, and Naito rolls him up for the pin at 15:11 in a really disappointingly dull match. I was waiting for unhinged craziness and it was just kind of a messy six-man. And WTF was the point of Sammy putting Sting through a table with a 630 and then Sting just shook it off like it was nothing? Dude’s in his sixties, don’t waste stuff like that on shit matches like these. *. Man, poor Jericho, having to follow one of the greatest matches of all time in Toronto with a dead crowd…AGAIN. This guy can’t catch a break.

Bryan Danielson v. Kazuchika Okada

HOLY SHIT they got Europe! Kevin notes that the Best in the World argument might be settled here, but I’m pretty sure Will Ospreay won that one earlier. The crowd is already doing This is Awesome chants before they even lock up. They fight for the knucklelock while the crowd gets a lot of stuff out of their system, and Bryan takes him down for the surfboard and stomps him down. They fight to a stalemate and Okada puts him down with a back elbow and dropkicks him out of the ring. They fight on the floor, but Bryan runs him into the post and follows with a baseball slide to send Okada into the desk, then adds a diving knee off the apron. Bryan runs his arm into the post and back into the ring for the diving stomp on the arm, which gets two. Bryan with Cattle Mutilation and he beats on Okada in the corner with kicks, but that just angers the man. Danielson charges and Okada flapjacks him and puts him down with a big boot. DDT out of the corner gets two. Bryan tries to go up to the top and Okada dropkicks him down to the floor and backdrops him into the front row. He follows with a dive over the railing, and back in for the Money Clip from Okada. Man he never did get that thing over. Bryan fights out of that, so Okada puts him down with an Air Raid Crash for two. They fight to the top and Danielson beats him down with elbows and follows with a missile dropkick. They slug it out with forearms and Okada dropkicks him into the corner, but Bryan hits him with a german suplex to set up the running kicks in the corner. But Okada puts him down with the dropkick and then goes up for the flying elbow. Bryan catches him in an armbar on the way down, but Okada makes the ropes easily to escape. Okada bails to the apron and Bryan just nails him with a kick to the floor and follows with a tope, but Okada catches him and tries the Rainmaker, and Danielson ducks it and dropkicks him out there. Danielson with the Yes kicks, but Okada suckers him into a tombstone on the ramp and they’re both down. Back in the ring, Danielson sells the neck injury with damn convulsions, so Okada drops the flying elbow and it’s time for the RAINMAKER. Despite the zoom out, Bryan goes dead weight and Okada can’t hit the move, so Okada picks up his twitching body and tries it again. And Danielson hits him with the bu saiku knee and it’s a double down. “It was a ruse!” declares Tony, although to be fair he got fooled by Kevin Nash in a Sting mask for like 3 years straight. Okada with a german suplex, but Danielson lands on his feet and hits another knee for two. Bryan declares that it is time to kick his head in, but he’s only got one arm and Okada rolls him over for two. Bryan with the head kick, but Okada blocks the knee with the dropkick and a landslide to set up the Rainmaker, for real this time, and that gets two. Okada maintains the wrist control and puts him down with another clothesline, but sets up another Rainmaker and Danielson reverses him into the Lebell Lock despite the bad arm. Okada tries to reverse out, so Bryan uses his own leg to fortify it in a horrifying submission hold and OKADA TAPS at 27:50?!? Holy cow. That was not a finish I would have bet on. This was pretty great, but the crowd seemed understandably tired after the previous classic. ****1/2. About damn time Bryan Danielson got his main eventer due in AEW, though. Hopefully he goes back to the BCC and puts Yuta in a 60 minute neck crank to celebrate.

Despite one notable misfire on this show, everything else basically delivered what was promised or way overdelivered more than what was promised. Easily the best PPV of the year and well worth your money.