The SmarK Rant for AEW Rampage – 07.01.22

The SmarK Rant for AEW Rampage – 07.01.22

Happy Canada Day!

I’m pretty pumped because I bought a new Sony TV, and they have Chromecasts built into them, which means I can now cast from Fite.TV

Taped from Detroit, MI

Your hosts are Excalibur, Jim Ross & Tony Schiavone

Royal Rampage Battle Royale:

This is a two ring Rumble, basically, and we start with Darby Allin and Tony Nese in one ring, and Hangman Page and Powerhouse Hobbs in the other. Page nearly puts Hobbs out right away, but Ricky Starks is #3 and makes the save. Team Taz double-teams Page, while Darby backdrops Nese out of the Blue ring to eliminate him. Butcher is Blue #3 and he smashes Darby into the railing to soften him up. John Silver is Red #4, and he teams up with Page to suplex Hobbs. They share a hug and then try to eliminate each other before laughing it off. Max Caster is Blue #4, rapping about how Tony Khan will hug him when he wins. And Billy Gunn appears to be managing the Acclaimed exclusively now. Rush is Red #5 as this continues to move at a pleasant clip, and he runs wild on the red ring. Blade is Blue #5 and he double-teams Darby with Butcher and then they work over Caster for good measure. Penta is Red #6 and Silver gets tossed as a result. Swerve is Blue #6 and he quickly dumps Caster. Keith Lee is Red #7, which has Swerve amused, and Team Taz attacks Lee. Matt Hardy is Blue #7 and he goes after the Blade. Dustin Rhodes is Red #8 while Penta and Rush exchange chops and then fight to the apron and slug it out until they eliminate each other. Frankie Kazarian is Blue #8 while Matt hits the Side Effect on Blade, but Butcher backdrops him out. Dante Martin is Red #9 and he has Starks hanging from the bottom rope, but not touching. Kenosuke Takeshita is Blue #9, and he gets a good reaction as he continues to get over, and he hits Swerve with a Warrior clothesline and powerbombs Darby. Blade clotheslines Kazarian out in the meantime. Brody King is Red #10 to finish off the first ring and he beats the crap out of Dustin. Orange Cassidy is Blue #10 to finish off that ring, while Brody chops Dante right out of the match. Orange hits Butcher and Blade with a double rana and then exchanges chops with Takeshita before taking a brainbuster. Team Taz gets rid of Dustin over in the red ring, while Takeshita misses a high knee and gets dumped by B&B. Orange turns his back on Swerve and gets dumped, while Starks tosses Lee out after Lee tossed out Hobbs. B&B get rid of Swerve while Page dumps Starks, and Brody knocks Page out to win Red ring. Darby dropkicks Blade out and then Butcher, and Darby wins Blue ring. So it’s Darby v. Brody King, and Brody throws him around the rings and cannonballs him in the corner. Darby manages to get him to the apron and bites the fingers while trying to get him down, but Brody muscles him to the apron with a sleeper and then just dumps him like a piece of trash to win at 22:49. So Brody gets a title shot on Wednesday after a very entertaining Rumble variant. Felt like the one minute intervals might have been a bit too short to really build tension but it picked up nicely by the end. Hopefully they do this one again. ***1/2 As a one-off challenger, Brody King is a good choice.

Meanwhile, Alex Marvez tries to interview Hook and nearly gets beat up.

The Young Bucks v. Hirooki Goto & Yoshi-Hashi

Nick beats on Goto in the corner to start, but Goto and Yoshi-Hashi do some goofy double-teams on the Bucks to take over. Matt hits Yoshi-Hashi with the northern lights suplexes and the Bucks dump them and follow with a dive. Back in, they double-team Yoshi-Hashi while Excalibur explains Japanese folklore. Yoshi fights back with chops on Matt, but Matt clotheslines him and kips up like Shawn Michaels. The Bucks continue working on Yoshi, but Goto gets the hot tag and hits Matt with a leg lariat in the corner to set up a bulldog for two. Nick comes back with a standing shiranui on Goto for two, but the Japanese team double-teams Nick with a legsweep and neckbreaker combo for two. Goto hits Nick with a lariat, but Matt superkicks him and everyone is out. Goto with the ushigoroshi on Nick and it’s back to Yoshi-Hashi, as they double-team Nick with another ushigoroshi for two. Matt saves with another superkick, and the SUPERKICK PARTY gets rid of Goto, setting up the BTE Trigger on Yoshi-Hashi, and double springboard Meltzer Driver to finish at 10:39. The timing was all over the place on this one and it didn’t feel like the usual Bucks match as a result, but it was good thanks to the finishing sequence. In particular there were two or three spots where someone seemingly forgot to kick out in time and the ref had to stop counting. ***1/4

Meanwhile, Jonathan Gresham challenges Tully Blanchard’s new team to a match on Rampage. Oh joy, more ROH. That’ll really bring in the ratings.

Nyla Rose v. Toni Storm

Nyla beats on Toni to start and suplexes her, but Storm fights back until Marina Shafir pulls her out for a bump to the floor. Nyla runs her into the stairs and they fight on the floor, but Nyla charges and runs into the post by mistake. Back in, Nyla takes her down with a spinebuster for two. Nyla with a chinlock, but Toni makes the ropes. So Nyla hits her with a corner splash, but misses the cannonball, allowing Storm to fight back with the hip attack. Nyla bails and Toni hits both heels with a DDT, and back in with a bodypress for two. Nyla clobbers her down for two and tries the powerbomb, but Toni counters, so Nyla sits on her for two. Toni tries a rollup in the corner, but Nyla pulls off the turnbuckle pad to block it and superkicks Toni for two. Nyla goes up with the guillotine knee, but that misses and Storm suplexes her for two. Shafir gets involved again, but Toni runs them together and DDTs Nyla for the pin at 9:49. Good chemistry from these two. *** The heel beatdown seems to follow, but Thunder Rosa makes the save and Excalibur declares that it’s time for THUNDER STORM. I see what he did there.

A good show this week, with the Royal Rampage worth taking time to check out in particular.