CM Punk (because someone has to ask you about him)

Fox wants CM Punk to host a show on SD, basically a pre-show thing with interviews and Punk hyping the storylines/matches for a channel that hardly anyone gets and if they do get it, probably can't find it without searching the program guide and about 10-20 minutes of combing through it on their tv screen.

WWE is willing to go along with it, but for a variety of reasons involving the three parties, Fox will have to pull an "Alan Moore working for DC by being paid by Wildstorm directly out of Jim Lee's pocketbook" level shennanigns by having Fox pay Punk's salary themseves.

At best, this is going to end up with a Jay Sherman/Coming Attractions on "The Critic" style farce where Punk is a snarky bitch who makes fun of everything the WWE does and people waiting for HHH or Steph or Vince to storm the stage Duke Phillips-style (or Marcy Rhodes storming the set of Al Bundy's "Shoe-Phone" commercial to beat him up when the bank loan she floats him to pay off the loan he took from Steve Rhode's bank is used for more commercials promoting Shoe-Phone, fucking her even worse and costing hubby Steve his job and her, her manager job) to tell Punk to shut the fuck up.

But this is just pretext for the fact that Fox wants Punk on WWE programming and will definitely push the WWE to rehire Punk proper AND push him hard, because they desperately need an A-Level star the mainstream knows/cares about due to Brock being a lazy fuck and no one giving a fuck about Reigns and Rollins and Koffi and His Royal Highness Baron Whogivesashit.

And exiling Punk into a circle jerk with AJ Styles or Koffi or Daniel Bryan or forcing him to try and get over another piece of dogshit like Ryback or Henning's brat, won't work period. Because Fox and more important, the casual fans, will want him in the main event, headlining and in the thick of all of the main storylines. Especially since he has a go-to storyline (his being driven out by the WWE) to work with.

And Fox will fucking want HHH/Punk to fight again, because HHH is still a big name who's married into the family and can be made to dance for Fox and their audience at any time Fox demands it. And that there is money to be made with Punk finally getting his revenge on HHH at long last. And in all of this, will be the fact that you just fucking KNOW HHH will want to destroy Punk, bury him worse than any of his other victims, given the acrimonious split between Punk and the WWE and HHH in particular. And double that, if Punk uses the hour of prime time TV Fox is paying him, to basically rant like Keith Olberman off his meds, about how HHH and Steph are responsible for driving him out of the company and the root cause of all of the company's troubles and uses the Fox deal to go all Jay Sherman by way of Glenn Beck, mapping out the company's downfall from the moment HHH and Steph were put into a storyline together in terms of charts, graphs, and video clips.

So how does this play out? Does this play out as a Jay Sherman deal with Punk shooting on HHH and company until they have to get him under contract and in the ring because more fans are watching Punk than they are watching Smackdown, Raw, NXT and do their best to destroy Punk's legacy officially? Does Fox rebook the Summer of Punk (now; the Autumn of Punk) for the sake of a cheap ratings boost and HHH eating shit like he's never ate shit before, because Fox doesn't give a fuck who he's married to? Or do they stealth bury Punk by putting him into the equivalent of the the Phantom Zone, circle jerking with someone who he can have good matches with while pretending he doesn't exist?

Jesse