The SmarK Rant for Mid-Atlantic Championship Wrestling–01.25.86

The SmarK Rant for Mid-Atlantic Championship Wrestling – 01.25.86

Taped from Charlotte, NC

Your hosts are Bob Caudle & Johnny Weaver

BREAKING NEWS: Sam Houston has defeated Krusher Kruschev to win the Mid-Atlantic title over on the Muthaship. I’m actually missing that episode from my archive, because 24/7 skipped that week for whatever reason at the time. Might have to go back and fill it in.

Ronnie Garvin joins us to start, and he’s sick of people talking about Ric Flair when he was able to hang with Flair on TV, and surely Flair will be in a lot of trouble should he ever get a title match. For example, in a couple of weeks on the Superstars on the Superstation show I reviewed a little while ago.

The Midnight Express v. Rocky King & Italian Stallion

Rocky gets a dropkick on Condrey to start, and Stallion comes in with his own, but he quickly gets clobbered in the MX corner. Bobby abuses him in the corner and gets a snapmare for two, and they let King come in before quickly finishing him with a flying elbow from Eaton at 2:00.

Arn Anderson is here with his two belts, although one of them would quickly be retired. Arn has learned that public opinion belongs with all the other crap in the toilet, like Dusty Rhodes. Rumor is that Ole won’t be back to defend his National tag team titles in 30 days, but it’s UNTRUE. FAKE NEWS.

Jimmy Valiant stops by next and he’s feeling like a train ran over his head while he was standing on the corner. Wait, where did a train come from? What city does he live in that train tracks are built over top of sidewalks in urban centers? I mean besides Calgary. Actually, maybe he was in Calgary. Anyway, Tully Blanchard piledrove him on the concrete last week and this will not go well for Tully in the long run.

The Barbarian v. Gene Ligon

In a nice touch, Paul Jones stops to yell at Jimmy in the interview area, because that feud will never ever end. Ligon grabs a headlock on Ballbearing while Paul joins us on commentary and promises the debut of Baron Von Raschke next week. Barbarian takes over with a pair of big boots and a legdrop and adds a dropkick while Weaver relates how “it wasn’t that long ago” that Paul Jones and the Baron were World tag team champions. Actually, that was in 1979. But point taken. Barbarian finishes with a flying headbutt at 3:59.

Dusty Rhodes is finally here, thank god, and he wants to remind us that he never lost the TV title that Arn holds, and also Ole isn’t coming back. Also, he insinuates that he’s really good in bed and Baby Doll is satisfied with his performance when they have sexual intercourse. Hold on a second…

OK, let’s move on.

Ronnie Garvin v. George South

Pulling out all the quality job guys this week! Garvin works a hammerlock and slams him as the announcers try to get “Three Horsemen” over as a thing due to the absence of Ole at the moment. I remember that one always confused me as a kid at the time because I didn’t have the context of why the Horsemen were suddenly “Three” for a bit. Garvin wraps him up and goes to a very painful looking neck vice. South comes back and tries a monkey flip, but Garvin literally punches him out of the air to block it, and pins him at 2:46. BEST! FINISH! EVER!

Tully Blanchard is here and is proud of Caudle for getting a nice new suit, and also he’s not particularly scared of the Boogie Woogie Man.

Sam Houston v. The Golden Terror

Weaver is confident that this first major title will be followed by a long list of them to come for Sam Houston. Yeah, he never actually won another title of any note in the sport, unless you count the Central States belt in the dying days of that promotion. Houston works the arm, but Terror gets a backbreaker for two. Houston finishes with a bulldog at 2:45.

Pez Whatley runs down all the stuff he’s got going on in 1986, and it seems like coke is a major part of it. He pretty much just runs down everyone else’s feuds because he’s got no program of his own.

The Russians join us, and Caudle points out that they are current without belts, and we head back to World Championship Wrestling to watch Houston beat Krusher with help from the Road Warriors. The Kremlin is very unhappy about this development, so they have demanded that the Road Warriors be run out of wrestling once and for all.

Nikita Koloff v. Mac Jeffers

Slam, bam, Sickle finishes at 0:30.

Magnum TA joins us, and he knows there’s a lot of people who want his title. But his current target is Nikita Koloff.

Ric Flair is here and apparently all the women in his like wake up the next morning wondering if there’s life after Flair. Also, if Baby Doll wants to find out how a woman should feel, she should jump on him. Also, Dusty’s shitty redneck wardrobe offends him. Man, when Dusty was wearing the fur coat everyone was busting on him, too. The guy can’t win! Also, the Rock n Roll Express and all their teeny bopper fans with the training bras disgust him, too.

Tully Blanchard v. Patrick Tanaka

Tanaka gets some offense on Tully, so Tully gets an armdrag and stops to strut about it. Tanaka slugs away and gets all fired up, but puts his head down and gets kicked in the face, and the slingshot suplex finishes him at 2:00. You could tell Tanaka had something even in these quick squashes.

Sam Houston joins us with his Mid-Atlantic Championship title here on Mid-Atlantic Championship Wrestling, and it shows you little this show meant by now when the supposed top champion was SAM HOUSTON and he’s about a million rungs down the ladder from all the other champions featured on the show. Pez is also here and he would like to face Arn Anderson for the TV title. Good luck there.

The Rock N Roll Express v. Tony Zane & Stony Burke

The absolutely raucous reaction for the Express’s entrance is very muted due to the music getting expunged, but HOLY SHIT was the crowd losing their minds for them. Ricky works the arm of Burke and the RNR double on it, but Burke brings in Zane and he doesn’t fare any better. They put Zane down with a double elbow for two, and the double dropkick finishes at 2:45.

The Midnight Express get the last word this week, and Cornette has been deluged with letters from 12 year old girls who were mad about the attack on the RNR last week. So Ricky calls them out RIGHT NOW and they look to oblige, but then Cornette chickens out and calls it off and we’re out of time.

That Garvin squash wins the week, the rest is gravy.