Kayfabe Commentaries Timeline Series: 1985 WWE as told by Greg Valentine

This was filmed in 2011

Sean Oliver is your host.

It runs at one hour and fifty-five minutes long

JANUARY

On January 1st, “Prime Time Wrestling” makes its debut hosted by Jack Reynolds and Jesse Ventura. Sean asks Valentine about the role of a heel commentator. Valentine said he loved Jesse standing up for the heels and how he also told things from a wrestler’s point of view.

Valentine talks about hating the “All-Star Wrestling” tapings in Brantford, Ontario then says “I hate Canada” before saying he is sorry.

On the Tonga Kid quitting, Valentine said he thought Tonga was very talented and a nice young kid but was not showing up for a lot of dates as Valentine said many guys were missing dates due to various reasons. He then tells a story of Hercules supposing to main event a match against Hulk Hogan in Chicago but accidentally went to Seattle as the office sent you tickets in advance and sometimes the cities would change. Valentine himself said he got heat for going to the wrong city after being told to ignore one of the tickets he had as he joked about likely receiving that call while hungover and forgot it happened.

When asked about female referee Rita Chatterton, Valentine said he hated it then mentions sitting with her in the Albany, NY Marriott Hotel parking lot where Rita told him her life story as Valentine said it blew his mind but he then chalked it up as nonsense. Valentine then said he heard her say the same things on TV years later. When asked why they were in the parking lot, Valentine said they took a “smoke break.” Valentine then goes on about not liking a female referee or why she was there in the first place.

Barry Windham & Mike Rotunda defeated Adrian Adonis & Dick Murdoch for the Tag Team Titles on January 21st. Valentine said the company switched directions and put over Vince McMahon, Pat Patterson, and others for staying up day and night planning out the product while saying WCW would not have a clue what they were doing the day of TV.

Valentine said having Lou Albano turn babyface was great for the company as it brought in Cyndi Lauper. Valentine then tells us how when they taped TV in Allentown, PA a few years prior he would go out to dinner with Vince Sr. & Jr., Albano, Sgt. Slaughter, and a few other office employees where Albano would get shitfaced and tell jokes about everyone. Valentine then said when Albano quit drinking he stopped being funny but when he was drinking Albano was a riot.

Regarding Hillbilly Jim, Valentine said he was one lucky guy. Valentine said he was a nice guy that the fans liked but not talented and wound up with a WWE job for many, many years. Valentine also said the company took care of Jim whereas other performers that have been with them for years that were talented never got the same breaks. Valentine then talks about Uncle Elmer and how he sold fake Rolex watches and recalls when one of the British Bulldogs bought one and the face popped right off.

FEBRUARY

When asked about wrestlers being allowed to give input to who they are paired with Valentine said you can bitch about it but they want full control. He also questions why you would put Fuji & Jim Neidhart together then is asked about Fuji as a manager. Valentine thought Fuji was good in his role though.

Valentine said that everyone hated Mr. T because he was a prima donna with a terrible attitude. He also thought Mr. T was disrespectful to the wrestlers. On David Schultz getting fired after trying to attack Mr. T, Valentine said that Schultz did not appear to understand the business because once you have a program with Hogan you go on to feud someone else or leave the territory and come back later. Schultz thought he was getting screwed and tried to create his own angle. Valentine also goes into the incident and how a bunch of LAPD grabbed Schultz and cuffed him on the floor with his hands behind his back and face in the ground as Valentine said Schultz was crying due to the pain. Valentine said that Schultz did not get past the apron as Mr. T. was in the ring.

Next he is asked about “The War to Settle the Score” show. Valentine though the Rock & Wrestling connection was fantastic then talks about the celebrities in attendance and mentions Andy Warhol being at the Madison Square Garden shows back when he started in 1979.

On Bob Orton, Valentine said he partied with him and they had a few beers together just last week. Valentine considers Orton a good friend and a great wrestler. Valentine also said the cast came about due to Orton actually breaking his wrist.

Regarding the 20/20 piece on wrestling where Schultz slapped John Stossel, Valentine said he hated it as he made his money from serious wrestling. He then talks about wanting to beat the crap out of Eddy Mansfield (who was one of the wrestlers that helped “expose” wrestling) then worked a show for him in Aruba 20 years later and as Valentine said by that point hundreds of people had exposed the business.

Valentine then said he liked blading and talked about how it was almost like having a “climax” but only liked doing so when it fit the match, not like guys blading two minutes in or doing that because they can no longer work and mentions the then recent Hogan vs. Flair match for TNA.

Jimmy Hart first managed Valentine on the 2/23 episode of “Championship Wrestling.” He figured they signed Hart due to his connection to music and puts him over as a great guy and are still good friends today. They both talk about how many managers there were at the time.

Valentine now tells a story while they were taping TV at the Mid-Hudson Civic Center in New York. They were in the basement and doing promos for all of the cities they were going and Jake Roberts left his snake in the bag to do something. Davey Boy Smith then took out his lighter and would light it near the tail of the snake and you can tell the snake was getting pissed. Valentine said he walked away as he wanted no part of what was happening. All of a sudden, Valentines hears a commotion as Jake had the snake around his shoulders for his interview and the snake squeezed his neck. Jake was yelling for help as Valentine said the Junkyard Dog ran the other way and ultimately the snake was pried off of Jake.

On Crockett trying to run in New York, Valentine said they should have stayed in the South then blames Jim Crockett for letting Dusty Rhodes tank the company.

MARCH

On Hulk Hogan making Richard Belzer pass out and split his head open during the 3/28 episode of “Hot Properties,” Valentine said it was a dumb move on Hogan’s part and you cannot do stuff to people that are not trained.

APRIL

Sean asks Valentine about the locker room atmosphere for WrestleMania. Valentine said it was just like any other night and did not get any sort of pep talk from Vince. When asked about an after parties, Valentine said he was not invited and just grabbed his belt and went back to the hotel.

Valentine said that Tito Santana wanted to wrestle him at WrestleMania but booker George Scott wanted to continue their feud and not blow it off at WrestleMania as Valentine said that was the right call in the long run. On wrestling JYD, Valentine said he was such a nice guy and puts over having a secret to work with anyone by getting around their flaws in order to work his style.

MAY

“Saturday Night’s Main Event” makes its debut on NBC. Valentine thought it was great to be put on National TV and remembers his matches on that show against the British Bulldogs. Valentine also said that NBC would not have input in the matches but did have a lot of input on what to say in the interviews. On Paul Orndorff’s babyface turn, Valentine said he made a much better heel and put a “damper” in his career.

JUNE

On Ken Patera getting sent to prison, Valentine first could not believe the news as Patera was always nice to him but attributes it to “roid rage” which was something they did not know about back then.

Jimmy Snuka wrestles his last WWF match for four years. Valentine talks about Snuka having personal problems and got caught with “contraband” coming out of a Middle Eastern country and it all made Vince nervous.

Terry Funk made his debut on the 6/29 edition of “Championship Wrestling” and even roughed up ring announcer Mel Phillips. Sean asks Valentine about Phillips and Valentine said he heard a lot of strange things with what happened with the ring boys. Valentine also said he thinks Phillips got away with it for a while because the kids were older then started messing with younger kids.

JULY

Tito Santana reclaims the Intercontinental Title from Valentine in a steel cage match. Valentine said that in his mind he thought he’d regain the title later but was told prior he would become a Tag Team Champion. On the finish to the match, Valentine thinks it was Gorilla Monsoon’s idea for Tito to kick the cage door into Valentine’s face as he was coming down the cage and felt it was a great finish. Valentine said he took the belt and smashed it inside of the cage because he knew they were making a new belt but had he known what people would pay for that today he’d have kept it then was shocked to learn from Sean that Tito ended up tossing his belt into the trash.

Randy Savage makes his WWF debut. Valentine recalls meeting Savage for the first time in 1972 at a show in Indiana when Savage was still playing baseball. Valentine talks about Savage paying his dues and knew he’d get over. Valentine said that Savage was a quiet guy in the locker room. Lanny Poffo also made his debut as Valentine calls him a nice guy who was strange. Sean then asks which Poffo brother was the oddest and Valentine said Lanny then jokes he did a lot of “contortionist” tricks. Valentine also said that Savage took the WWF deal as long as they signed Poffo and Valentine even mentioned his dad hired Poffo in Tampa just to see his tricks.

AUGUST

Valentine talks about Dino Bravo and how he did not like their team and though the angle was dumb. Valentine also said that Bravo had a terrible temper and brought with him a lot of drama so he went to Vince and got out of the team. (This was not part of 1985 but Sean asked him about Bravo, who was in the company for a few matches at this time).

Miss Elizabeth makes her debut on August 24th. Valentine said that he lived a mile away from Elizabeth & Savage and that Savage kept her locked in the dressing room to keep the boys away. And when Elizabeth was off the road, Valentine heard she would not be able to go to a store alone and would have to bring one of Savage’s parents.

The Dream Team defeat Windham & Rotunda for the Tag Team Titles. Valentine talks about what makes a tag team work and that you need a captain and someone to take orders with Valentine being captain due to his experience. He then talks about Windham & Rotunda flipping out and going back home to Florida that ended with both men getting fired although Rotunda was re-hired later on and paired with Dan Spivey. Back to the match, Valentine said he hated the finish (lit cigar to Windham’s eye) but it got over and said that it was created by George Scott.

Corporal Kirchner makes his debut on August 31st. Valentine says the WWF thinks they can take any guy off of the street and teach them to bump and they’ll be able to draw money. Valentine thought he was a nice guy and heard a few stories of him trashing hotel rooms then says he’s done that a few times himself.

SEPTEMBER

Valentine tells a story about going to Vince upset about something (thinks it was a payoff) then Vince told him he had a check from the action figures and it was for $80,000 as Valentine said he took off and forgot what he was mad about.

When asked about his favorite “Haku is tough” story, Valentine said he took someone’s eyeball out once in a bar fight then once took out Jimmy Jack Funk’s eyeball out at a hotel bar in Chicago. He also calls Haku one of the toughest guys in the business, which once again is the general consensus among wrestlers.

OCTOBER

Sean asks Valentine if Uncle Elmer’s wife was smartened up to what was happening at her legit wedding from “Saturday Night’s Main Event.” Valentine said that she got hit in the head with a bottle and did not sell it then questions who would ever marry Uncle Elmer.

He talks about Danny Spivey having little chance to get over as a replacement for Barry Windham. Valentine also brings up Spivey beating the shit out of Adonis backstage after they were having problems in the ring.

NOVEMBER

On Rick McGraw passing away of a heart attack on November 1st, Valentine said it was sad and one of the first drug overdose deaths for the WWF. Valentine also said everyone knew he was taking a lot of pills and recalls in Japan at dinner, McGraw’s head would be in his rice before the meals would come out.

Valentine is asked about the Land of 1000 Dances video. He said they were there from 10am to 3am due to Meat Loaf not acting afraid of the wrestlers like he was supposed to and Iron Sheik was unable to get his part right so they modified what he was supposed to do as he adds they did not get paid for the day. Valentine said they were all a happy family for the most part in 1985 and had made this a fun time.

When asked if a fan really did win a Rolls Royce at the Wrestling Classic show, Valentine said he was unsure then talks about how in the Carolinas they would do a deal where someone would get a deal on a car and they’d “win” it at the wrestling show after already making payments. Valentine then adds that George Scott was the booker then in the Carolinas and here in the WWF and that could have been the case. Great story here.

On Spider Lady (Fabolous Moolah) defeating Wendi Richter, Valentine said he did not care due to the fact he does not like women’s wrestling but said he did like Richter as a person and heard about the tension between her and the company.

Valentine closes out by saying it was a great year that shaped what wrestling is today.

Final Thoughts: Much like in the ring, it took Valentine about 15 minutes to get warmed up and once he did this became a good interview. He told several good stories, added insight, and had a surprisingly good memory for someone from this era. Valentine also is not a guy that has an axe to grind but was clearly going to stick up for himself and not just tout the company line.

If you’re a fan from this era I’d certainly seek this out.

You can purchase the video through DVD, digital download, or as part of the KC Vault by clicking on the link below:

http://kayfabecommentaries.com/DVD_TL_1985.html