Wrestling Observer Flashback–10.16.89

“Oh hey, we’re really enjoying 88 and 89, but we want to see what 85 is like! You should totally go back and do that!”

“What? You mean after 89 is done we’ll have to go back to yucky 85 for months? Boo!”

More proof democracy doesn’t work.

Also, Starrcade 89 was perfect as it was, with each match being ***** and better than the one that preceded it.

Also, this is FINALLY THE ISSUE THAT I’VE BEEN WAITING FOR!

– As expected, Demolition won the tag titles back from the Brainbusters at the Superstars taping, pretty much squashing them in 5:00 to regain their belts as Tully & Arn prepare to leave for the NWA. There’s much rumor-mongering about who else might leave with them, but so far the only name actually mentioned is Bret Hart. I can’t see that working out well for him.

– Ole Anderson made a surprising return to TV as a part of Team Flair, and will act as cornerman for the Flair-Sting team at Halloween Havoc. Dave is pretty sure it’s leading to SOMEONE turning on Flair.

– The trial of Dusty Rhodes in the Big Daddy case was kind of a win-loss proposition. DiBlasio technically won a judgment against Dusty Rhodes Les Thornton (the Masked Professional) of $317,000 damages for “designing an unsafe script”, but it’s all rather meaningless because Thornton is literally MIA somewhere in Canada and no one has seen him in years. Plus the company that Dusty was acting on behalf of, Championship Wrestling from Florida, ceased to exist in 1987. So kind of a pyrrhic victory.

– Dave notes that Maeda is trying to bring in World Kickboxing champion “Morris Smith” for a match at the Tokyo Dome. Man, 1996 Dave would just smack him upside the head for that one.

– Dave goes into a whole discussion of the plastic bag angle and Scott Steiner’s beating and whether it’s appropriate for wrestling to get that violent, and he notes that none of that stuff was any worse than Dusty Rhodes getting beat up in a parking lot on TBS in 1986, and the conclusion he normally draws is that “too much” is when ratings start to drop, and as long as that doesn’t happen, people can’t be too offended, can they?

– Let us return to Stampede, where apparently no one wants the tag team titles because the Blackhearts are changing on a weekly basis. So to recap, it started out as Tom Nash and David Heath, then Heath left to pursue his dream of writing Whitewolf fan-fiction and was replaced by skinny WWF jobber Red Tyler. Tyler lasted two days in the spot and they felt he was too small and replaced him with trainee Jason Anderson, but he’s already out and they’re looking for yet another replacement Blackheart.

– Owen Hart did not actually return as promised, so Larry Cameron is feuding with Davey Boy Smith for the North American title instead.

– Steve DiSalvo is back, by a staggering coincidence just before he was going to be asked to job the WWC Universal title back to Carlos Colon again. And in fact, he’s already talking about quitting wrestling and selling real estate again. At least we know he can sell SOMETHING.

– Buck Robley is trying his hand at another startup, called Heritage Championship Wrestling, which Dave graciously gives a section in the newsletter after one set of tapings. Yeah, that’s not lasting long.

– WWC update: Steve DiSalvo did in fact fly back to Puerto Rico to drop the Universal title before retiring to become a real estate agent.

– In the USWA, Frank Dusek was fired by Jerry Jarrett, although no details have been forthcoming.

– And finally, in the moment that I’ve been waiting for since about the beginning of the September issues, Dave notes that on the 10/6 TV show, the Headhunter beat Steve Williams, who is not the more famous wrestler but a rookie trained by Chris Adams whose real name is Steve Williams. Thank god, now I can stop combing the USWA sections and trying to understand the convoluted Embry storylines just in case I missed it. There you go, perhaps the most understated Observer debut of one of the biggest stars in history.

– Apparently there’s a new Samoan team in the territory, creatively named The Samoans, consisting of “Tio and Tapu Taylor”, who are a father and son duo. As if I don’t have ENOUGH trouble keeping track of the ones that we’ve heard of!

– Eric Embry’s latest supercard idea: WRESTLEWRECK ‘89, where the wrestlers will compete in a demolition derby before the show. If no one’s falling off Cobo Hall in a monster truck, it’s not getting my fucking money.

– Dave has a new experience this week, as a wrestler called him to complain that he rated his obviously one-star match too high, giving it two stars when it wasn’t warranted. I can guarantee that wasn’t Edge or Chris Jericho.

– Jerry Lawler is already doing clean jobs in non-title matches to the Soultaker because he understands business.

– Florida is still alive and has changed their name again, now going from Florida Championship Wrestling to Professional Wrestling from Florida again. Is this like Robert DeNiro in Casino where they change the name for legal reasons every month so they don’t have to ever get a license to promote or something? The Eddie Gilbert and Missy Hyatt circus is apparently coming to town as a part of that.

– Ron Fuller and David Woods, the owners of the CWF (Continental) had a falling out and it’s pretty much the end of the promotion as a result, with Fuller basically going to the NWA to run Knoxville instead. I think Woods might have carried on with the CWF name for a while, though.

– Lots of thrilling stuff at the Superstars taping where Demolition won the belts, like Andre the Giant and Haku forming a tag team, The Bolsheviks reuniting, and Dino Bravo getting a renewed push in preparation for an Ultimate Warrior feud. Dave recaps the angle where Earthquake got picked out of the crowd to sit on Warrior’s back for a pushup exhibition and then turned on him, and Dave though it was hella lame. Yeah, well, Hogan was laughing all the way to the bank by Summerslam 1990.

– Greg Valentine beat Red Rooster in a squash, “which shows where Rooster is headed” notes Dave. It took him SIX MONTHS to figure that out? The name “Red Rooster” and doing jobs for Steve Lombardi in February wasn’t enough of an immediate clue for him that perhaps Terry Taylor was better off where he was before?

– Tugboat Thomas is not getting over at all in dark matches, although Dave thinks it might be some combination of the fact that he hasn’t been on TV yet, plus that fact that he goes “toot, toot” during his matches and his work sucks. Well, two of the three worked fine for Kevin Nash.

– Rick Martel is now “The Male Model”.

– Now that Piper is actually being ADVERTISED for his house show appearances, the advances for the Rude series have been incredible.

– The MSG show that was put together to compete with Halloween Havoc won’t be broadcast until the night after due to commitments to the New York Rangers. So there you go, blame hockey, not the cable companies.

– They’re doing an excellent job of the slow burn with the Cornette-Dudes-Midnights angle, with stuff like the Midnights saving the Dudes from a Freebirds beatdown but coming in a bit too slow, and bickering with Cornette with shootish comments.

– Sid Vicious broke his own record for ineptitude this week, somehow managing to injure BOTH Dynamic Dudes at a house show in the same match!

– Ricky Steamboat is planning to sue the NWA for using his likeness in Halloween Havoc advertising, which is indeed pretty shitty of them.

– And finally, Dave dedicates the last section to Roller Derby, which is normally where I hit the big punchline for the week and that pretty much kills the gag. So THANKS A LOT, DAVE.

I’m out.