The SmarK Rant for Mid-South Wrestling–03.15.86

The SmarK Rant for Mid-South (Power Pro) Wrestling – 03.15.86

This was the syndicated show rather than the normal weekly TV, which is an odd choice for inclusion.

Your host is Jim Ross

Korchenko v. Perry Jackson

Korchenko ranks highly on the list of worst fake Russians ever, up there with luminaries such as the Russian Brute and Soldat Ustinov. Korchenko slowly pounds away on the poor jobber and finishes with a body vice into a backbreaker.

The Road Warriors squash a pair of geeks on NWA TV in 10 seconds, with Animal pressing Hawk onto the guy for the pin.

Koko B. Ware v. Rob Ricksteiner

Young Rick Steiner, fresh out of college, is cut up like a bodybuilder here, back before he became the wacky nutjob heel with no neck. They fight over a wristlock while Steiner complains to the referee about all the cheating tactics of Koko and hairpulling and such. Koko hiptosses him to the floor, but Steiner gets a cheapshot out of the corner to get the heat on Koko. Koko quickly makes the comeback and gets the missile dropkick for the pin at 5:00. *

The Blade Runners v. Brett Wayne Sawyer & Sean O’Reilly

Flash overpowers Sawyer, but runs into a dropkick and brings Rock in. Joel Watts on commentary notes that Rock is pretty deranged, probably from steroids. OK then. Rock chokes away in the corner, but Sawyer gets a dropkick (sold like someone on his first day in the ring by Hellwig) and brings in O’Reilly. He fares no better, as Flash comes in with a big boot and grabs a bearhug. Rock chokes away again and I ponder who in their right mind would believe these goofs would each be World champion four years later…at the same time! A terrible Hart Attack clothesline finishes at 4:48. Hellwig was seriously so jacked up on roids at this point that he could barely even move his own limbs. He walked like a stop motion-animated LJN wrestling figure. Jim Ross gives a very diplomatic “They’re not really that polished…” after the match, but he thinks they’ll be big stars eventually. Really, World champion Rock? That’ll be the day.

Chavo Guerrero v. Steve Keirn

Loser gets painted yellow, as this was a spinoff from the Fabulous Ones v. Guerreros feud. Chavo pounds away in the corner and Keirn runs away a few times. Chavo takes him down and works the leg on the mat. Keirn runs away again and this time Chavo wraps him up in the Romero special and we take a break. Back with Chavo continuing to beat on Keirn. Suplex gets two. Chavo picks him up in a bearhug and does something that was supposed to be an overhead suplex, but Keirn can’t or won’t go up for it and Chavo just kind of flapjacks him instead mid-move. That was ugly. Chavo with a german suplex out of the corner to finish at 7:28. Keirn got almost no offense here and looked like he was having trouble going along with Chavo’s stuff. *1/2 Keirn grabs a foreign object and knocks out the referee, and the Fabulous Ones double-team Chavo, and of course it’s Chavo who ends up getting painted yellow. Kind of a shitty match, actually. Not sure what Keirn’s deal was here.

We get a classic clip from Mid-South TV, as the Midnight Express throws a party to celebrate winning the tag team titles, only for the Rock N Roll Express to run out and shove Cornette’s face into the birthday cake in one of the all-time great Cornette moments. Jim cutting the cake while stressing that NO ONE in the crowd is invited to the party is tremendous, as he’s just such a dick to everyone, and then immediately gets his comeuppance.

The Pulse

A complete nothing show, which was probably only uploaded because of the random Blade Runners squash.