Ring of Honor – August 19th, 2015

Howdy!
Let’s get the preliminaries out of the way here…

As requested last week, I’m going to add a basic ‘watch/don’t watch this match’ to these recaps, with the caveat that I don’t particularly care for ratings, but I’ll give it a shot for you all.

Ring of Honor TV – 8/19/15
We are TAPED from the William J. Myers Pavillion in Baltimore, Maryland! Your hosts are Kevin Kelly and Nigel McGuinness! Yay, no Corino! They announce our main event will be Roppongi Vice vs The Young Bucks! Boo, the Young Bucks! I’ll have more to say about that when we get to that match.

Silas Young vs Dalton Castle
Well, there’s definitely a history here. For those that don’t know, Silas Young is the mustachioed last real man, and Dalton Castle is flamboyant, calls himself a peacock, and comes to the ring with scantily-clad dudes he uses for furniture that he calls his “boys”. Feud pretty much wrote itself. Castle defeated Young at Best in the World 2015, and Young hasn’t forgotten.

Code of Honor is most definitely NOT followed as Castle leaps at Young in the corner! Fists and headbutts are fired by Castle as he pounds Young from corner to corner. Boot by Young is caught by Castle, but Young puts him down out of the corner with the other foot. Charging clothesline is ducked and Castle goes to a backslide, but Young rolls through. Young fires a kick to Castle’s head, but Castle ducks and hits a chop. Another right takes Young to the corner, but Young ducks a second shot, tries to clothesline Castle in the corner; Castle ducks that and takes him back to the center of the ring with an armdrag. Rolls him over and fires headbutts to the back of the head. He keeps going, to the point where he stops headbutting Young and just starts headbanging. Young gets back to his feet, kick, by Young is blocked by Castle, shot to the gut. He sends Young to the corner and rolls him up, but only gets 1. Young maintains the cradle hold and deadlifts him up for an overhead suplex! Very cool. Young rolls to the outside and gets fanned down by the boys, and that may have been a mistake on their part. He pursues the boys on the outside, but Castle comes inbetween both boys with a shot to the head of Young. He sends Young back into the ring, but stops to pose for the crowd; once he gets back in, Young takes control with shots to the head. Young chops him and sends him off the ropes, but Castle catches the top to stop. Young charges, but Castle pulls down the top rope and sends Young to the outside! Young landed on his feet, though, and grabs Castle’s legs from behind, sending him to the mat face-first. He pulls Castle outside the ring and sends him to the barricade, and the excitement is too great for all of us, so let’s take an ad break!

We’re back with both wrestlers in the ring, trading shots. Fists, chops, and knees are fired, neither man able to gain control. Finally, Young gains control with a backrake that would do Hulk Hogan proud! Young looks for a surfboard, but the boys are up on the apron, and Young chases them away. He turns around and Castle gets him up for the Bangarang, but young wiggles out and rolls through. He runs to the corner and turns around with a clothesline to Castle off the second rope. Crowd: “You still suck!” Young heads over to Castle, who grabs him around the waist and gets an overhead throw! Castle with a waistlock, but Young elbows out. Castle charges into the corner with a flying knee, but Young moves! Castle wipes out over the top and to the floor. Young seems content to wait for the countout, but Castle gets back in at a 7 count. Stomp by Young! Knee by Young! Knee to the face by Young. Castle chops him, but there’s nothing there and Young puts him back down with a chop of his own. Silas lays on the badmouth, and Castle starts firing back. Brief exchange which Young seemingly wins, but he drives Castle back into the ropes and Castle comes off charging, dumping both himself and Young over the top rope! Both guys hit the floor hard. Castle recovers first and starts firing at Young against the barricade. He tries to send Young to the ring, Young reverses, Castle baseball slides around into a rana! Very smoothly done. He sends Young back in, running elbow to the corner! Running knee to the corner! Sends him to the other turnbuckles, Young stumbles out, swinging side slam! 1,2, no! Castle’s shocked. He doesn’t know what to do, and he tries to pick Young up, who kicks him away. Castle with a shoulderblock into the corner. Blind charge by Castle meets an elbow from Young, then a kick to the gut. Young with the DDT into the turnbuckle! 1,2, NO! Young tells the ref it was three, but there is a disagreement of judgment on that point. Young gets Castle up in a fireman’s carry, but Castle wiggles out, looking for a German, standing switch by Young, sends Castle off the ropes, backbreaker by Young! Clothesline from the backbreaker position completes the Killer Combo, and now Young gets Castle up again….but the boys are on the apron again! Young drops Castle and clotheslines one of the boys to the floor! Young is satisfied and turns around…into a Bangarang by Castle! 1,2,3! (Dalton Castle over Silas Young, pinfall, 9:14)

WOULD YOU WATCH IT AGAIN, RICK? It was fine for a TV match. Several of the shots were very loose, to the point of almost just hitting air. But these two have chemistry together; Castle has the charisma to be a player, and I like Young and his character, so YES, I will pass this one and say worth watching again.

After the match, Silas gets on the mic and tells Dalton that he’s “damn, damn tired of this.” He says what he wants to say, because he’s a real man! Dalton Castle, I don’t like you lifestyle or what you’re doing with these boys! They need to learn to be men! Dalton Castle, you can’t beat me on your own, so one more time, and when I win, I get the boys! And those boys are going to be mine and I’m going to teach them how to be real men!

I doubt any comment or joke here could live up to the double meaning of Silas Young’s last speech, so I’ll just leave it at that.

Time for Inside ROH! Mandy Leon is here to tell us about dissension in the Kingdom, and that has led to Adam Cole and Kyle O’Reilly recently reforming Future Shock to fight The Addiction! Let’s take a look at ROH TV from 2 weeks ago, where Future Shock defeated The Addiction in an impromptu match after Christopher Daniels interfered in the main event, but Chris Sabin hit the ring afterwards to join in the beatdown! Well, next week, The Addiction puts their tag team titles on the line against Future Shock on ROH TV! More Kyle O’Reilly in the main event = happy recapper Rick!

Up next, time for an interview with Bobby Fish! Until then, how about some ads?

We’re back with Kevin Kelly and Bobby Fish. What does Fish have to say? Footage is shown of Fish making Daniels tap out in Las Vegas in a 4-way elimination match to become the #1 Contender. Fish: “Big things are going on for reDRagon, if I’m going to be honest with you, Kevin, my thoughts? I don’t think that Jay Lethal makes it through Hanson! I think I’m going to be facing Hanson for that TV title-“ Mr. Jay Lethal has come out to rebut this scurrilous attack on his testicular fortitude! Lethal tells him that he doesn’t have a chance; hey, Fish says, he’s just being honest! Lethal has too much on his plate, and it’s the perfect time for Fish to take the title! Lethal is escorted away by a gaggle of referees. “He’s scared, Kevin!” Let’s take a look at these ads!

Kushida, Nakamura, and Okada are coming back. Look, I enjoy watching NXT and will be watching Takeover on Saturday, but if I had to choose between watching either one of the two live? When the main event for ROH on Saturday is reDRagon vs Lethal/Nakamura??? PLEASE.

Moose vs Will Ferrara
Prince Nana has joined us on commentary to talk about his protégé, Stokely Hathaway and Moose.

Code of Honor is followed. Ferrara comes out firing with rights, but Moose shrugs him off and sends him off the ropes. Will ducks a Moose clothesline, but Moose scoops him off a charge. Ferrara fights out of the tilt-a-whirl and fires 3 more rights at Moose, and Moose sells nuthin’. Big knee from Moose stops Will dead in his tracks. Charge to the corner from Moose eats a boot from Ferrara, who’s giving it a go here. Ferrara is perched on the top rope, but Moose hits a dropkick to send Ferrara to the outside. Moose stalks him there and gets him in Swing position, and swings him between the corner barricades. Moose picks him back up and rolls him back in. 1,2, no! Moose tells the crowd that’s it, but Ferrara fires rights to the gut from his knees. Chops and rights by Ferrara….have almost zero effect as Moose no-sells most of them and fires a huge uppercut at Will. Moose gets Ferrara up in Snake Eyes position, but Ferrara turns it around into a DDT! Moose rolls to the outside, Ferrara off the ropes, suicide dive DDT on the floor! Ferrara struggles to get Moose’s prone carcass back into the ring as the announcer’s speculate it’s due to the weight difference. Ferrara goes to the top rope, but Moose charges him and hits and overhead throw off the top! Moose sets up….spear! 1,2,3! (Moose over Will Ferrara, pinfall, 3:24) Code of Honor is followed after the match.

WOULD YOU WATCH IT AGAIN, RICK? Nope. I understand that Moose is their Goldberg except he’s an actual wrestler and all that, but he gave Ferrara nothing here, no-sold almost every shot, and just in general bored me to tears. Hard NO on this one, skip it.
Coming up, our main event of the evening! Until then, let’s watch some ads!

Dalton Castle wants you to buy his shirt! It’ll change your life!

Let’s go to the back! Adam Cole can’t believe that we’re going to watch Future Shock challenge for the tag team championship in the year 2015! He’d have called you a liar if you told him that, and if you’d told him that he’d be sitting out for 5 months after shoulder surgery, and if you’d told him that his friends in the Kingdom would question what he brings to the table as a wrestler! What does he bring to the table? Why, he brings the whole table! Next week, he and Kyle O’Reilly are going to shock the world and win the World Tag team championships! Or he’s going to turn heel. Probably the second one.

Okay, so a few weeks ago in my first recap, I made a tortured and wildly inappropriate metaphor regarding the Young Bucks; this week, I’d like to actually talk seriously about them. Here’s what bothers me so much about the Young Bucks: they have the talent to be good professional wrestlers and they’re not. That’s pretty much it. You can tell by watching them in the ring that they’re experienced and polished, but they refuse to sell for shit or even attempt to tell a real story in the ring outside of wink-wink/nudge-nudge stuff towards the audience. Watch any of their matches in PWG, or even ROH for that matter, and tell me that I’m wrong. They don’t have wrestling matches, they have parodies of wrestling matches that get people up and excited without ever investing them in a story, since they refuse to tell one that is grounded in any type of reality. They’re tremendous athletes and great gymnasts, and they pop the crowd like nuts. I’m not ashamed to admit I’m just another sinner in many respects, as I pop for the awesome double teams and cool shit they do, but all the while it feels just like watching explosions in a Michael Bay film, where I know that there won’t be substance of any kind underneath it. Matt and Nick are truly the children of guys like Jeff Hardy or RVD; they’re all flash and pizzazz, but when you pull back the curtain, there’s nothing there. But what a show that came before it, right? And before you tell me that the matches are supposed to be spotfests, let me tell you that I completely agree; that’s exactly what their matches are supposed to be. But professional wrestling matches aren’t all spotfests, they involve selling, they involve building to a climax, they involve capturing the audience in more ways than chanting ‘Holy Shit!’ after someone does some insane twisting flip dive over the top rope. Of course, spotfests can be fun from time to time, but I don’t call them great matches, and for a company that literally touts itself at the beginning of EVERY broadcast as the best professional wrestling on the planet, well, that company is choosing to be held than a higher standard. Hey, WWE may be garbage in many aspects, but it KNOWS its garbage in many aspects and doesn’t attempt to pretend that what they present is pro wrestling; ROH wants to be the higher standard, and they should therefore fit that higher standard.
Long story short – I don’t like the Young Bucks that much, but I do like them. It’s confusing.

Hey look, it’s main event time! Makes that rant I just went on a few minutes ago seem appropriate!

The Young Bucks (Matt and Nick Jackson) vs Roppongi Vice (Trent Baretta and Rocky Romero)

I’ll try to keep up here. Code of Honor…who are we kidding? Bucks give each other the ‘too sweet’ gesture as Baretta and Romero just shrug and shake each other’s hand. Alrighty, I guess the Code of Honor was followed. In some way.

Nick and Baretta are going to start us off here. Standing side by Nick, off the ropes, shoulderblock by Nick puts Baretta down. Criss-cross, leapfrog by Baretta, somersault over by Nick, who catches Baretta’s arm. Kick to the side of the head by Jackson, keeping the wristlock. Runs up the ropes in the corner, flips out and armdrags Baretta. Superkick attempt by Nick, but Baretta backed off. Tag to Romero, tag to Matt. Romero and Matt circle, lock fingers, and Matt gains the upper hand with a kick and forearms to the back. Off the ropes goes Romero, he ducks a clothesline, running rana! Kelly fills in the home audience about the Roppongi Vice/Young Bucks feud as it relates to New Japan, where it’s really just Chaos against the Bullet Club, and these boys are on opposite teams. Romero charges Matt in the corner with a clothesline. Another! He looks for a third, but Matt charges out with a clothesline of his own. He taunts Baretta into coming over, then grabs him in a headscissors on the apron while Nick comes in with a dropkick on Baretta, sending him to the floor. Matt alley-oops Nick over, but he lands on the apron and comes off onto Baretta with a tornado DDT on the floor. The match is literally less than two minutes old at this point – I’ll let you decide if that’s a good or a bad thing. Back in the ring, Matt charges Rocky in the corner, but gets an elbow for his troubles. Romero looking for sliced bread #2, but he gets caught and the Bucks are looking for the Meltzer Driver! Romero wiggles out and sends Matt to the corner, crotching Nick on the top rope. Matt rolls out to the floor, Romero hits a suicide dive through the ropes, sending Matt to the barricade. Romero and Baretta turn around….into a top rope dive from Nick Jackson! Let’s take a break for some ads!

We’re back, and now the Bucks have Rocky double-teamed in the ring. Gutbuster into a neckbreaker into a backbreaker by the Bucks, but when Matt goes for the pin, the ref reminds him that he’s not the legal man, and escorts him out of the ring. Nick puts the boots to Romero. Backrake by Nick. Baretta is apparently STILL out on the floor. Nick tags in Matt, then sends Romero to the corner. Matt with a cartwheel, then a backflip, and finally Trent Baretta says ‘enough of this shit’ and comes in with a running knee to Matt’s face. Baretta puts Nick on the floor and then tosses Matt, and we’ve got all four wrestlers outside the ring, battling it out. Baretta sends Matt to the barricade, and he and Romero double team Nick with a flying knee by Romero. Baretta sends Matt back in for Romero, who sends Matt to the corner. Romero does a cartwheel of his own, then a backrake of his own on Matt, and then proceeds to mock the Bucks’ superkick pose. Tag to Baretta, double team elbow by Vice. Romero off the ropes with a kick to a seated Matt, then a standing moonsault from Baretta. 1,2, no! Chop by Baretta puts Matt down again, then a boot to the back of the head. Tag back to Romero, he fires at Matt. Slam by Romero, and a tag back to Trent. Baretta runs back and forth on the apron like an IDIOT, so Nick Jackson just comes across the ring and superkicks him to the floor. Tag back to Romero, who takes out Nick in the corner to prevent the tag, as Kevin Kelly laments that Steve Corino isn’t here for the fun of a Young Bucks match. Speak for yourself, Big Kev. This match is much more enjoyable without someone screaming “SUPERKICK!” every 5 seconds. Romero clotheslines Matt in the corner! Again! Looks for a third, but this time he gets alley-ooped to the outside and Nick is there with a superkick on the apron! Finally, Matt makes the tag and Nick comes in. He runs immediately over to the corner and dropkicks Baretta to the floor. Running knee to Romero in the corner. Flip to the outside on the other side of the ring, and running kick from the apron to Baretta puts him back down. Romero charges, but Nick pulls down the top rope and Romero goes to the outside. Flippity-floppity stuff by Nick ends up with him hitting a moonsault from the apron to Romero at the same time as Matt coming through the ropes with a suicide dive onto Baretta. Nick sends Romero in and hits an absolutely BEAUTIFUL senton bomb off the top, full rotation and lay out. 1,2, no! Crowd thinks this is awesome. Tag to Matt. Double superkick is ducked by Romero, and he hits a double rana on the Bucks. He attempts to send Matt outside, but Matt gains a facelock and runs up his brother for a sliced bread. Nick runs through Romero with a vicious knee. 1,2, Baretta makes the save. Too much action, not enough ads! Let’s solve that problem!

We’re back with all four wrestlers in the ring. Baretta is being double-teamed by the Bucks in the corner, but he reverses and sends Matt into the corner, but Matt jumps over a charging Baretta. Nick with a superkick attempt that is caught by Baretta and sent into Matt. Nick charges but Baretta puts him down with a double stomp. Matt charges but Baretta moves and he eats the turnbuckle. Tornado DDT by Baretta! Romero gets ahold of Matt, codebreaker by Romero! He holds Matt in position for Baretta, double stomp off the top rope! 1,2, no! Tag to Baretta, but Matt gets out of the way of a charging Trent and tags in Nick. Enzuigiri by Baretta to Matt, but Nick’s legal and comes in with a spinkick to Baretta’s head. Romero comes in, Nick catches the foot, so Rocky tries for an enzuigiri, which Nick ducks, then a reverse, which Nick ducks, and then Nick tries for a knee to the face, which Romero ducks. Rollup attempt by Romero is rolled through into an elbow from Nick, who informs Romero that he is deceased. Nick comes off the ropes, but Romero catches him with a jumping knee. Baretta from behind, overhead release suplex on Nick. Matt comes off with a superkick to a seated Baretta after the move finishes. He attempts to superkick Romero, but doesn’t get all of it and gets turned inside-out from a Romero lariat. All 4 men are down! Romero and Matt trade shots inside the ring. Matt sends Romero to the ropes, where he gets tangled up, but he moves when Matt charges, sending Jackson to the floor. Romero and Baretta set up….Jumping Knee Doomsday Device on the floor! Back in the ring now, Baretta and Nick. Nick with a shot to the gut from the apron, comes over the top with a DDT….nope, Baretta caught him with a Northern Lights Suplex. He rolls through it and drapes Nick on the top rope for Romero to come off the other side with a dropkick. Shining Wizard by Baretta! 1,2, no! Nick fights out of a double suplex attempt, but he runs into a double running knee by Romero and Baretta. They get set up for Strong Zero, but Matt is back and breaks that up, and Nick gets a Canadian Destroyer on Baretta! Tag to Matt, who gets Romero up, Buckle Bomb and a kick to the back of the head from Nick! Cannonball/Kick combo in the corner to Romero by the Bucks! Matt sets up for it….Nick with the 450 splash! 1,2,no! Matt sets Romero up on the top rope, but Baretta’s back, and he runs up for a German, but Jackson lands on his feet! Superkick to Baretta! Double superkick to Romero! Giant somersault dive over the top by Matt to keep Baretta on the floor, and More Bang for your Buck finishes. (Young Bucks over Roppongi Vice, pinfall, 12:55)

WOULD YOU WATCH IN AGAIN, RICK? Yeah, probably. Everyone was in on the joke here, with neither team really selling much, but it never slowed down and was breezy for a 10+ minute match. The Bucks get a pass from me this week, and I’ll say YES, check it out. Just know what you’re in for.

Post-match, The Addiction and Chris Sabin come out for the beatdown on the two teams. Celebrity Rehab by The Addiction! They tape Matt Jackson to the top rope and tee off on him, then they hit an Indy driver on Nick, and that’s where we’ll end our ROH TV this week, as The Addiction stand tall in the ring.

Rick Poehling
@MrSoze on Twitter